If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize