i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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