is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I need to sanitize my soul.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize