Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
