And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize
