I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Randomize
