I showed him my bush... on skype.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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