So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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