im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
