yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
