He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
