Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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