She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
