My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
