ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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