hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Holy shit dude........stairs
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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