if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
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