hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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