Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
