I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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