What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I will pee on everything he values.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
