if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
