I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
