She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
