guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You're like the curious george of whores
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize