I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
