my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
