i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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