ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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