i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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