if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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