My sheets look like a crime scene.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
