return my video game
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
