How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
