Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
