It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
