We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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