She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
