remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
