i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
im on a boat
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