He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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