would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
people are starting to question the shark bite story
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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