Walk of Shame. In a state park.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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