When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
