Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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