How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
