I skipped work to stalk him.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize