I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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