why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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