I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize