But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
